Orientation Day: You Are the Student, Says Pudding

Original cat comedy · Short read · Fiction

Professor Pudding welcomed the human to orientation by sitting on the handbook. This ensured that all information would come through him.

The human said, “That’s my magazine.” Pudding admired the confidence of a first-year student who already believed she could identify course materials.

The academy offered three core subjects: noticing the cat, responding to the cat, and recognizing when the cat preferred that noticing stop.

Attendance was compulsory whenever Pudding entered the room. Examinations could occur at any time, often immediately after the human became comfortable.

The human asked whether she could have her magazine back. Pudding began the first practical assessment: how long would she wait before disturbing a sleeping professor?

She fetched another magazine. This demonstrated initiative but failed to address the central learning objective.

Pudding awarded provisional credit.

By lunchtime, the human had opened two doors, adjusted a blanket, and commented on his handsome face. He decided the class showed promise, despite a worrying tendency to believe that all of this was happening voluntarily.

Keep the comedy going

Part of Professor Pudding’s Human Academy.

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